marti and erin.com

Here’s the website of a woman who wrote a book about her “year of yes.” She spent a year accepting every date she was offered, including dates with a 70-year-old man, a homeless dude, and her mother’s reincarnated dog. Her only rules — no guys who were married, drunk when they asked her out, obviously on drugs, or obviously violent. She ended up meeting “the one” and they’ve been married for three years so far. Perhaps this concept is the perfect antidote for those of us who are a bit cynical?

Another fan….pretty soon we’re going to have to start a fan section of this little enterprise.

“ALSO, I was VERY happily blown away by the recent blogging frenzy on martianderin… total hilarity. keep ‘er coming.” — Carpline 9

Not just us, it seems….

“Centuries from now, scientists may point to this as the moment in time when the pickiness gene became dominant. In the end, it will come down to one really old, lonely guy and his list.

“She must have blue eyes. She should like animals, but not in a weird way. No thin lips. No lawyers,” he’ll be writing, just before he keels over and the human race comes to an end.”

Check out the full article from today’s Washington Post here.

Just a fast note to tell you when you google “love” you get the weirdest list of websites. Of the about 1,070,000,000 hits that you get, the descriptions on the first page contain info on (and I quote):

- Courtney Love
- the love calculator (not sure what that is)
- the website for Love Actually
- a fictional story about a white couple trying to related to black people
- Locks of Love (charity for children who have lost their hair for medical reasons)
- a guide to internet resources on languages
- and finally, three resources on love- one with advice on relationships, one with romantic quotes and poems, and one with a personality test.

On the right side are advertisements for Match.com and how to mail order a bride from Russia…and I thought we were the cynics.

Last night I was out at a club in NY and, sober in a sea of Long Island Iced Tea drinkers and with our month of consciousness on my mind, I decided to make some mental notes about the root of love cynicism: The Mating Process. The following are my observations about the people who are out to have a good time and find meaningful relationships all in one evening. I would like to add a caveat first, however. For those people who were out “just to have a good time” and actually mean that, then this list does not apply to you. From the looks of the crowd, though, there were a lot of people with high hopes.

1- The dance floor was packed with men that all looked alike and women that all looked alike. Same clothes, same hair styles, some general expressions…and in a badly lit location. This is not really your best arena for getting a good enough look at someone to even be able to summarize their features. Plus, I’m not even sure how you’d know if you were attracted to someone, unless you sense the pheramones from sheer proximity.

2- By the sheer nature of the location, its loud. Its supposed to be. You’re not going to be able to talk to people, you can barely hear yourself think. To the best of my knowledge, solid relationships are built on shared goals, values and interests. Unless you value your shoes, share a goal of not getting stepped on and are interested in dancing without moving your feet, this may not be the forum to find that person. People attempting to engage in conversation should have realized that this venue made that futile.

3- Desperation is palpable. Is it easy for others (men and women) to sense that you are searching. Your demeanor eminates the crowd and they know that’s not just a little laugh and a coy smile, but a quick calculation of whether or not you are boyfriend/girlfriend material. You’re not fooling anyone and the rest of the crowd can see it a mile away.

Overall, don’t get me wrong. Stranger things have happened than finding true love on a crowded dance floor, but in general, I don’t think this is the best way to go about achieving your goal. Go out and have a good time! Leave relationship seeking for daylight hours when you can differentiate yourself. I think it might just be worth it.